Sometimes it's hard not to be a smart-ass...

So, student athletes from certain teams have signed waivers to have their coaches know about their academic performance throughout the semester. I just got the form for one of my students. I want to answer the questions, and to do so honestly....but....well....it's hard not to be a smartass on some of the questions.

Attendance to date: "spotty." "infrequent." "rarely attends, and yet still frequently tardy..." "sometimes stands outside classroom without entering."

Student needs further help in: Attendance. Class participation. Remembering to answer all questions on tests.

Specific suggestions for student: "Student, you should attend class more often. On days that you do attend try to get here on time, or at least with more than 10 minutes left in the class period. Oh, and when you get here, you should come IN here. Like, actually enter the classroom and sit down at a desk.

When you take a multiple choice test, you should answer all of the questions. In the future, you should DEFINITELY answer more than half of the questions. You do have a 1 in 4 shot at being right, you know!"

The funny thing is, I really do like this student. He's not stupid, either. It's just, well...to answer honestly makes me sound like an ass! You would think that suggestions would be things like:" spend more time reviewing the textbook," or "try the online tutorial!" But, really, I think the two things that would improve this student's grade are for him to show up, and answer the questions!